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Welcome to my blog! I often use this as a way to express my feelings or frustration with situations. Hope you enjoy reading it and it serves to provide you with a little entertainment as well.




Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Parenthood, Life, and other Musings

So I have been thinking about a few things, like women do, you know losing sleep all night long running plays in my head over and over. Didn't want to get more frustrated by stressing my husband out with it. He is one of those guys that can listen at times, (emphasis on the at times) but then almost like a transfer of emotion he is upset while I am calm after I have gotten things off of my chest. It really is just a repetitious cylce because I then get stressed because he is stressed. No need for both of us to be stressed right so I decided to expel my analytical diarrhea before it drove me crazy, this might be a little all over the place but bear with me.

Life in general: At what point did these unrealistic standards get set as examples of the perfect lifestyle? Shouldn't what makes you happy be your idea of a perfect life? You have a roof over your head, family and friends, and even though you know it is wrong to envy, you can't stop yourself. Oh I wish I looked like her, made what she made, had a car like that. All things that for the most part shouldn't matter. Why can't one be happy just to be? Even Socrates didn't have the answer for that crap. I will continue to ponder.

Parenthood: So until you have children you will never fully understand the pressure and stress that comes along with the experience of being a parent. Though it is the most wonderful life changing event anyone could ever experience, it is also very trying.

I love and I do mean LOVE LOVE LOVE my children to death, but sometimes you just reach a point where you wonder if you are doing this right. Let's face it we have all at one time or another seen a child misbehaving in a store or in a restaurant and laughed to ourselves, oh no honey see if that was my child I would not be havin that. YEAH right! Those are people with no kids, or brainwashed children. Because, keeping it real at one time or another that will be your child. I know it's embarrassing isn't it? You try to act like they aren't with you, or you don't make eye contact with the people that are staring at you like awww that poor bad mom, her kid is the devil, while you are waiting for the floor to open up a black hole and suck you in. For once I wish some one would stand up and shout, Don't you judge me! You don't even know me! I wish 7 bad kids on all of you! You know all of you have kids that do this too! Don't look at me like it's my fault, I am not the one on the floor screaming as if my hair is on fire because I can't have a piece of candy, that is him and I am trying to fix it but you make it worse when you all stare at him and give him the pity eyes like I am making him do it! In case you didn't pick up on that memo...I have been there done that with my children. As you can see though, after having my own issues with my children I have tried to stop that mentality of the disapproving onlooker, I know how it feels.
My children are two of the most stubborn kids in the entire world sometimes I swear. I work to be the perfect portrait of the "good mom" standard that has been envisioned all this time. Which by the way if I ever figure out who painted that portrait, I will choke them! Sufficient to say it just isn't that easy.
I grew up a pretty good kid, great grades, loved school, taught to respect my elders. How does one do this? I wish I knew the answer because I swear I am raising my children the same way I was raised but they just aren't getting it! My kids can be punished 30 times over and for the most part, the desired outcome is never witnessed. You can spank them, talk till you are blue in the face, take every single toy they own, put them in timeout for an hour in Siberia, give them enough stickers to build the sears tower, make little charts, or put soap in their mouths, and like a UFC fighter that refuses to go down they get back up and look at you shaking it off like...and so...That's all you got? Come the heck on seriously.
Some days I am at my wits end as to what is the one thing that will reach them and keep them on track. There should be a magic pill or something that we can do; short of investing in one of those dog training shock collars (clearly that is inappropriate and I wouldn't do that, but it's a thought). Is it the language I am speaking? I have thought about this at times when I am really desperate; like hmmm...I wonder if I am somehow off line with what they are thinking and they by some miracle speak French or German when it comes to punishment? Do they have a "special" word that means stop to them? What if I am saying it wrong? FAT CHANCE. It was worth a shot, so now we are just back at square one facing the reality that they just don't listen, and I am repeating myself and trying everything else under the sun that is in every book I can get my hands on. I believe I have a future in the Calgon take me away commercials, because I think that several times a day. The most frustrating thing is even though I know this is normal, I can say it, but I can't make myself believe it. I have the guilt for working, the anger that they won't listen, the shame from them not behaving, and 7,000 other emotions that run through my head daily. This estrogen stuff is for the birds.

People that don't listen:

I hate to say it but I just can't take people that do not listen, I hate repeating myself. I might as well be talking to those mini people that live with me! If I wanted to repeat myself and deal with people not listening I would be a stay at home mom. Stop interupting me if you want to know the answer, and open your ears when I give it to you!!! You know those people that think that they know everything, but then they keep asking you how to do it? Did you hear what I just said? That's right you just asked me how to do it...why are you telling me how you would do it instead of listening to the answer YOU requested? I don't have spare time to listen to you hear yourself. I am answering your question because you asked, obviously they way you were going to do it wasn't working so you came to me. Am I right? ahhh ok done now.

2 comments:

  1. Liz! I love that you are doing this! :) It feels good to get it all out doesn't it???

    I was cracking up at the part about speaking another language. I swear just today I looked at Ryan and said to him "Can YOU understand me? I AM speaking English right? Perhaps our boy here doesn't speak this language"...
    HAHAHAA!

    Good stuff.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Liz, I am laying on my couch at 10:20PM CRACKING UP at the part about the child being on the floor screaming like his hair is on fire because he can't have a piece of candy! And I love the part about wishing 7 bad kids on each of the onlookers. I will have to check myself because I really do that to parents! Like you said, it's those of us who don't have kids. :)

    Keep writing this blog. It always makes me feel like I'm talking to you!

    ReplyDelete

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