Revelation #1 All of a sudden I am no longer fun. My kids used to love me, thought I was great, and couldn't breathe without me. Now they tolerate me, think I'm embarrassing, and are suffocating when I'm near. Now I expected this change to occur eventually but not until the teenage years so I was kind of caught off guard. My husband says get used to. I said but everyone else's kids like me. He says that's how it works your kids won't think you are cool and they will be embarrassed when their friends think you are. Accept it and move on.
This light bulb clicked on over my head at the school dance we attended last night for my son. As he danced and mingled I realized he was kind of avoiding me. Trying to be the ever involved parent I kept approaching him and every time shot down! I noticed at one point I was literally chasing him as he was trying to get away from me. I thought what the heck I know he sees me, then it hit me...He does see me he is running from me! Sad face :( I gave up and realized I was meant to stand on the wall and dole out quarters and occasionally purchase a drink for them. Ok no harm no foul fine I get it. I move on to child number two who is having a ball dancing the night away. I jump in next to her in the cupid shuffle only to realize when I make the next turn to kick now kick now she too has abandoned me. Ok I can take a hint I walked it by myself back to my little lame parent corner and did my job of having no fun.
Bet you suckas wanna see me tomorrow when you want breakfast or need laundry done, maybe I will walk away like I don't hear you. Just sayin
Revelation #2 Even at 5 the little girl is showing signs of TROUBLE. This party girl walked into the school not knowing anyone (keep in mind she goes to a completely different school) but was at the center of every dance off circle, the front of the line in group dances, and up at the DJ booth constantly. We discuss leaving and she informs us that the DJ has not played her songs she requested yet...Wait what? Did I hear her correct. I said your songs? She says yeah I asked him to play Lady Ga Ga and Usher...What 5 year old has enough balls to go up and request songs at a dance where she knows no one!? Apparently mine. All I could hear was I'm with the DJ ok. I prayed right then and there because I knew this chick was setting us up for a long and tumultuous teenage experience. Chastity belt and surveillance cameras are on order as we speak. God give me strength.
I found it only fitting that I provide graphical evidence of said subjects party habits so I have included a video. Exhibit A is in the green shirt having what looks like too much fun. I rest my case.
Hang on parents, it flies by so fast!